14
Feb
09

Guy who broke Chase Utley’s hand signs new deal

He’s taller than Cha Seung Baek, but shorter than J.A. Happ. He’s a bit more roly-poly than Aaron Cook, but less roly-poly than the Roly-Poly King himself, Joe Blanton. He’s funnier than Dan Uggla, but unsurprisingly really boring compared to Jonathan Papelbon. He’s a lot less famous than John Lennon, but a little bit more famous than Kevin Mench’s Eagles tattoo. Who is he? John Freakin’ Lannan! And everyone cares!

Do your shoulders hurt just looking at that delivery? If they dont, youre a cyborg. Or an idiot.

Do your shoulders hurt just looking at the scapular whatever on that delivery? If they don't, you're a cyborg. Or an idiot. Or you're Chase Utley and your fourth metacarpal bone still feels like hell.

Anyway. I don’t have any monetary info about his contract, but in completely unrelated and mildly awesome Red Sox non-news, The Destroyah looks like a freakin’ gladiator.

I know Im small, but I will beat you up.

He knows he's small, but he'll still beat you up.

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2 Responses to “Guy who broke Chase Utley’s hand signs new deal”


  1. February 17, 2009 at 12:05 am

    John Lannan is still with the Nats?
    /invests in Duracell stock

  2. February 17, 2009 at 12:28 am

    Yep, he’s still with the Nats. I saw some headline from ESPN that was like “Lannan inks new contract”, and I just knew I remembered him from somewhere….


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